Valentine’s Day—you either love it or hate it. Based on the title, I’m sure you can all tell how I feel. This has been a topic of conversation amongst my group of weirdos, to someone in particular’s upset. Perhaps it’s because of my perpetual state of  being single, or maybe it’s because most of my friends are in loving relationships (I’m very happy for them, and not at all jealous). Anyways, enough about my feelings, you’re here for my opinions. 

Reason #1:

This is what I tell everyone when they ask for my reasoning, and I’ll put it simply: YOU SHOULD LOVE YOUR PERSON EVERYDAY. Love is about showing people how you feel about them 365 days a year. If you see something that reminds you of your person, and you have the means, you should buy it. Don’t get me wrong, this really has nothing to do with money—there are so many ways to show someone you love them. How you take care of your partner should always be something that is on your mind. Buy the ice cream, pick up the shiny rock, do the dishes because they always forget and the fork is gonna get crusty. Okay, got it? Good, moving on. 

Reason #2:

Greeting cards are expensive and you know it. Look, I love a card with a cat on it as much as the next person, but for $7?! You’ve gotta be kidding me. I’ll tell you something that costs nothing: if you make me a handmade card, I’ll cherish it so much more. Draw something that is so bad that I can’t quite tell if it’s a heart or something incredibly more concerning. Write me a little note, preferably about how much you love me, but really, I’m not picky. Better yet, put a little sticky note on the mirror when you know I’m having a bad day. Readers, it really is that simple. 

Reason #3:

This is the reason that will make you either agree with me whole-heartedly, or make you vow to create a call-out post on Yik Yak, and I’m prepared for either one. Here goes nothing… Valentine’s Day candy really isn’t that good. Conversation hearts taste like chalk and I stand by that. I’d like to say I’m sorry, but I’m not, and you know who you are. The heart shaped box of filled chocolates is also incredibly disappointing. Sure, it’s simple, it’s cheap, it’s a classic, but none of these things means that it’s good. For me, the holiday is not really about the candy, but if this is the opinion that wins you over, I’ll take it. 

Reason #4:

Don’t even get me started on Cupid. I know there’s history behind it, and I am in no way challenging that, but merely bringing up some modern-day discrimination. It’s fine for Cupid to shoot people with love arrows, but when I try to play matchmaker for my friend on Tinder, I’m the one causing trouble. And why can Cupid fly, but I’m stuck behind a phone screen? The double standards are crazy. I, for one, at least ask for consent, not something everyone does. Not naming names or anything.

Reason #5:

Okay, here’s where you say “But what about Galentine’s Day?” “What about your friends?” My points still stand! Tell your friends you love them on a random Thursday in November, give your friends chapstick in January, and most importantly, always keep the snacks stocked, because they will get eaten sooner rather than later. My friends are truly amazing people, and I strive to make them feel loved no matter the day (you know who you are). I’m just a cynic in a sap’s body. 

I love Love, it’s great, but I think it’s ridiculous that there’s a specific day for it. If you’re a Valentine’s Day lover, all of the power to you, and maybe I’ll share the same feelings one day. Hopefully that day is soon, because I’m not sure how much longer I can go. But for now, I wish you a happy February 14^th, no matter how you celebrate.  

Sincerely, 

The Grinch of Valentine’s Day

#besouthwestern