Galentine’s Day: The Girl Boss’ Pity Party of Unrequited Self Love
In the marketable era of “Girl Boss”, a backwards reclamation of Valentine’s Day has taken place. Cleverly coined “Galentine’s Day”, it suggests women need a romantic relationship in order to be truly happy in life. For the sake of this article, I am using the definition given by Gen-Z’s questionable bible: The Urban Dictionary.
This crass definition makes me think of a frigid “Girl Boss” who ought to be saved from her romantic and sexual dry spell. Girl Boss needs to be fulfilled by a handsome stallion of a man with six pack abs and a 3 carat diamond ring. She longs to be whisked away into the limiting bliss of housewife life. Girl Boss must hurry to find this man before she is old and barren, in need of botox and artificial insemination– gasp!
You can’t walk into a trendy office supply store without finding a bright pink binder embellished with “GIRL BOSS” in offensively reflective gold font. I loathe the label, it screams two words that oppose one another. “Girl Boss” is a belitting term, and only exists to clear up any blurred gender lines. This term reduces an empowered Boss to a little “Girl” in need of fatherly guidance. It suggests that a woman can only be incharge if her femininity is undeniably apparent. In movies, Girl Bosses are effortlessly gorgeous while working 60 hour work weeks. Girl Boss’ weight shifts from one stiletto to another, as she adjusts her slinky blouse. Even though she is a badass, her badassery is overlooked because– she doesn’t really have it all. This movie trope has misogynistic roots and is played out time and time again. Girl Boss dreads Valentine’s Day, and in order to cope she leans on her girlfriends. Galentine’s Day exists because women are pressured by society to find a man. The existence of this newfound holiday is directly tied to this idea of being a “Girl Boss”.
These movies, that we are socially conditioned to relate to, depict the Girl Boss as miserably single. She needs a man to attain true happiness. On Valentine’s Day, Girl Boss isolates herself with a box of tissues in desperate need of a sob session. In an appropriately pink pajama set, she sulks in her tastefully decorated penthouse extremely unsure of herself. She alternates between guzzling red wine and choking down handfuls of cheap sugary chocolate. In tasteful candle light, the seductiveness of the chocolate’s pink foil is undeniable. Its curvaceous heart shape is alluring. The decadence of this unbelievably processed sweet treat closely resembles the one night stands depicted in these movies. Trashy, desperate, and usually emotionally nauseating– yet still enjoyable in a sadistic self conscious sense.
Galentine’s Day in part exists to forgive indulging in sweets. Girl Boss, due to the looming imposition of the male gaze, knows she’ll regret her sugary indulgence tomorrow. But for the sake of tonight– she eats on. Between heaving sobs she stuffs her face, enjoying the sensual experience of chocolate melting down her throat as cloudy, mascara tainted rivers run down her face. Her head tells her to stop, as she has an impending need to vomit, but momentary satisfaction overrules. Grey tears continue to flow at an alarming rate. Her heart tells her to keep going– that there’s something positive to be gained here, even if it’s only a tantalizing 2 pounds.
Galentine’s Day is a pity party of unrequited self love. The holiday suggests being single is something to be mourned, as though a nonexistent love life is a death in itself. Galentine’s Day is an apology for something that doesn’t need to be apologized for. The concept reinforces the idea that love of oneself can only be achieved through someone else loving you. When in reality, self love can never be supplemented by romantic love. These insecurities of Girl Boss’ are only in existence because women are brainwashed to believe their worth as an individual isn’t enough. In order for women to truly be empowered both sexually and professionally, being single has to stop being depicted as depressing. I want to watch a movie about a boss, who happens to be a woman, who is truly fulfilled. Whose life does not revolve around the men in her circle, maybe the men in her circle revolve around her for a change.